Where I Assume The Role of a Non-Intimidating Girly-Girl

Tomorrow I am going to buy things, doing my part to stimulate the economy. As the things I will buy are intended to help me stay sexiful and, in fact, improve upon it, I’ll be stimulating all parts, after a fashion.

Here is one thing I intend to buy, as Ulta is having a sale:

http://www.ulta.com/ulta/browse/productDetail.jsp?skuId=2211288&productId=xlsImpprod1610087&navAction=push&navCount=1&categoryId=cat80045%20cat1090001 Perfect as I am traveling next week & need something I can dump into a TSA-approved sandwich baggy AND my little purse.

Here is another:

http://www.famousfootwear.com/Shopping/ProductDetails.aspx?p=75486&pg=1018602 All my jeans are far too long for flats, especially since I am slimmer & have less of a shelf arse. Also? This place is next to Ulta. Also? Shiny buttons. Also? Y’know the tendon or ligament or whatever that I hurt that’s made it hard for me to walk & do things since July 5, 2006? I discovered yesterday that if I wear heels, that disappears. So…I have become that woman. Yep, the woman who shortened her Achilles’ tendon to the point where sensible shoes do actually hurt me. We girls can do anything, right, Barbie?

Here is another:

http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=51742&vid=1&pid=696855&scid=696855222 in the Serrano green, and this is totally cute: http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=7525&vid=1&pid=662744&scid=662744052 and I would LOVE this if only it were a slightly more baby pink: http://oldnavy.gap.com/browse/product.do?cid=14295&vid=1&pid=685146&scid=685146092

No, I don’t have the money to get all this stuff. I will have to hope there are sales in the store. Or make hard choices. Or cry. Or find a sugar daddy within the next 24 hours. Right? RIGHT?!

So anyhow that was my token “style on a wicked tight holiday clearance budget” post for the season. Sorry, ladies & gay dudes, as I have been slacking mightily in that department for some time. Apologies also to everybody else, as you’re all mad I’m not posting something geeky or political or wiggy. I can’t please everybody all the time, or at least, not legally (even according to the laws of the state of Nevada, though it would be inevitable if this happened: http://www.theonion.com/content/news/nevada_to_phase_out_laws and it’s NOT safe for work).

Get On Your Boots, Yeah

The stereotype that girls like shoes is, unfortunately, true. It’s your fault, though. Well, if you’re a guy reading this, it’s your fault. You like our legs when we wear cute shoes, and you do notice cute shoes, even when you claim you don’t.

Case in point: I wear a sensible shoe to work because I work in medicine, & there is a lot of running around &, because I’m on a medical campus, it takes me 7 minutes to get from the parking lot to my office. I am usually in a sensible shoe. Even if I didn’t have fibromyalgia, I would probably be in a sensible shoe. Rick works with me, and he never notices the sensible shoes.

Last Saturday, I wore a heel for the first time in ages. Rick, absentmindedly, said, “I love the sound of those shoes. The tock tock tock of your footsteps.” Men. Love. Heels.

It’s going to be autumn on Wednesday, according to the weathermen in Reno. Yes, specifically on Wednesday. On Tuesday, it’s going to be 89 F. On Wednesday, 60. So naturally, thoughts turn to boots, and while looking for boots, we find shoes.

http://www.chineselaundry.com/indShoe.asp?type=p&store=b&id=3752&sess=09270971094413608

I am so not a Western crap type of girl, but these are kinda hawt:

http://www.chineselaundry.com/indShoe.asp?type=b&store=d&id=2275&sess=09270971094413608

God I love these:

http://www.torrid.com/torrid/store/product.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302040567&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442212224&bmUID=1254038618289

These are so bad ass:

http://www.torrid.com/torrid/store/product.jsp?FOLDER%3C%3Efolder_id=2534374302036097&PRODUCT%3C%3Eprd_id=845524442206296&bmUID=1254038843467

These are kinda cute, but sensible:

http://www.kohls.com/kohlsStore/shoes/womens/boots/PRD~473155/SONOMA+life+++style+Jaida+Mary+Jane+Heels.jsp?crosssell=true

Dude:

http://www.aldoshoes.com/us/women/pumps/platform/75695097-rosemore/97

Fierce. I would kill myself in these because the heel has no curve:

http://store.alloy.com/item.do?categoryID=1772&itemID=50575&sizeFilter=&colorFilter=&brandFilter=

Nice. Spendy.

http://www.zappos.com/calvin-klein-collection-angie-black-hair-calf

These. Are. My. Favourites. And. $1k. I can haz sugar daddy?

http://www.zappos.com/proenza-schouler-oi9700-nero

These. Are. Fucking. Ludicrous. In a good way:

http://www.zappos.com/the-highest-heel-handgun-19-black-stipe

Simple, elegant:

http://www.zappos.com/me-too-lunar-black-suede

I don’t wish to bore you any further & I could spend all day searching for $1k shoes (and, you know, go homeless). Next time I swear I will try to write something relevant that will be of meaning to you, the nation, the world, the universe, ok? Or at least be funny. You guys seem to like when the pretty monkey dances.