I have decided there is very little in the world akin to a girl sitting across from you, smiling at you with her eyes. This happened to me three times today. I can see why men are stricken with us; we are quite delightful.
I don’t have a ton of female friends, so when I do get to spend quality time with them, it’s pretty spiffy. I had dinner with the beautiful, effervescent Karoly after work. She is an interesting talker & a good listener. She is also an excellent coaxer. This is usually my job, so it is nice when someone can discern that you are bubbling with thoughts, & gives you permission to release them with joy. No judgment, just giggles. No pressure, just pecan pie. No admonishment, just encouragement. No gossip, just secrets.
I then got to see my sister briefly before Mass, & as always she is an instant light. She doesn’t have to be happy or “on it”; just seeing her makes me feel like the world works again. She is a constant joy & a piece of my soul. We are like some kind of ongoing, flawless act together. It’s like Jim Henson & David Lynch directed one of Aaron Sorkin’s hallway tracking shots. It shouldn’t work, but somehow it does. Life needs her.
I then sat across from Brit at our weekly Advent poetry reading at Saint Thomas. She brought fruit & cookies & hand outs & always looks at one with a rare & round interest. She is the sort of subject one would have painted in pre-revolution France. Part saint, part lightning in a bottle, she is elegant and compact and serenely beautiful, even when extolling the virtues of Green Bay.
I always feel slightly vulgar & stupid in Brit’s presence, not least of which because I am in fact slightly vulgar & stupid, & not at all because of Brit. Her bright hazel eyes seem to regard everyone with loving wonder, & one never feels judged. I can share my plodding thoughts about Jesus & she will find a way to make them pretty & she will look at me like I said them prettily. I imagine that if we baked together, I would produce lumpen cookies that she would decorate to look like flowers. She finds beauty.
I bet you feel pretty misled by the title, huh?